Inspired by Sharlene

Sometimes on a full moon...,
originally uploaded by azredheadedbrat.

The power of the Moon...

It seems that this little satellite is able to influence us on many ways.

All legends are based on some real facts; it is just hard to retrieve them. For example, Lycanthropy is a kind of mental disease, but, surprinsingly, it acts also at the physiological level... Power of the brain, of the mind...

I think everybody has a beast within, a dark side, a dark potential force.
Is it a kind of self-protection for us ? A reminiscense of old preservative instinct ? Is it something we should awake ?

It seems that animals can control this second personnality, just to assume vital functions. I'm more doubtful about man; nevertheless this possibility has always been fascinating: Dr Jeckyll is a good (and bad) example.
Another example is in Wolfen, this beautiful movie of Michael Wadleigh (the director of Woodstock) : this story tells the very ancient symbiosis existing between Indians and Wolves, their hunting ground, their persecution by white men and, then, their revenge. In this movie, we can see Eddie, one of these Indians, on a full moon night, mutating in a wolf; not on the outside (it's not a werewolf movie) but in the inside, in the mind... The fact is that he can control these new powers and wild instincts, unlike the white man (the hero) who is watching that. It is some ecological modern tale.

We are too modern to use this old power: so we should let our "wild self", our dark side, sleeping...

Inspired by Annene

,
originally uploaded by Annene von Durchgerockt.

"Old dreams were good dreams"

This is what Robert Kincaid said in "Bridges of Madison".

So true...

I saw the remake of "Cat people" by Paul Schrader's...24 years from now. And I discovered the streets and the atmosphere of the French Quarter in this movie. I could imagine even smells in restaurants, walks by night, with the movie's music inside my head. A strange feeling of soft melancholia; a peaceful island in the dark sea of my mind, waiting quietly...

Since that time, I never forgot this place. It grew in my mind like a recurrent living day-dream. It was a kind of "romantic cliche" which survived, after all these years; one of the elements of an ideal parallel life.

Time is flowing and the dream claim for its concretization. When you are so deceived by daily events, missed rendez-vous, mistakes; especially when you are so deceived by yourself, morning after morning; when this accumulation effect seems too heavy to stand...it remains something: somewhere in your brain. Take your dreams, look at them and shout : "soon you won't be dreams anymore".

Try to see this movie.

Now I must recover my bag and my passport.

Thanks to Annene for the virtual trip.

Inspired by Celine

Le penseur...,
originally uploaded by *sugar*.

How much time did he spend here ?

Where was his soul travelling ?

Sorrow, regrets, hurtings ?

Does this loss of time have any purpose, except to go down and down ?

Nobody near him, no animals, no human beings, on water or on earth. Going far away from crowd with the secret wish that somebody will come...Anybody... No, never; it never happens.

Perhaps is he an artist, a writer, some genius. Perhaps did he make some beautiful things in past. Maybe, he was some important person. But he doesn't see that; this is of no importance now; he's just looking at water, to calm down the agressivity of memories, eating him alive.


But perhaps...perhaps I'm totally wrong; perhaps is he happy and thinking that it was just a shame to have forgotten his fishing stuff...

We are just looking at what we want to look.
We interpret reality through the filter of our sensitivity.


Thank you Celine.

Inspired by Christina

birds on a wire,
originally uploaded by lunaryuna.

Cathy: "Mitch, why are they doing this, the birds?"
Mitch: "We don't know, honey."
Cathy: "Why are they trying to kill people?"
Mitch: "I wish I could say."



From Hitchcock's "The Birds" (1963).
(more on : http://www.filmsite.org/bird.html)

Inspired by Jill

"merely a kid keeping alive",
originally uploaded by Okaypro.

"I am aging without sound,
into darkness, darkness."

Anne Sexton

Walls are telling stories

Like the Shining in Stephen King's book.

A house, a wall, a window.

A bunch of memories. The little details which are the promise of a new beginning.

Same locations, same sounds, same smells; but you are alone.

Then you look in the other direction, the past and tears are coming. Then you dare to take a look at future, and you are lost.

A million of stories like this. Billions of virtual lifes.

Animal with memory: just a curse, just a curse.

Inspired by Laura

gathering,
originally uploaded by helveticaneue.

Time to change. Time to replace the "I" by the "they", "she", "he".

A puzzle with grey stones on a rainy day.

No blue sky because eyes are yet looking at the crowd.

Something is growing slowly, leaving 2-dimensional world. Something is trying to escape from its destiny.

Something is moving towards the blue sky, so stubborn, so crazy.

Just stimulation of feelings by power of an image.

A little trip of some seconds.

But a vital one.

Anyway, it's too late : picture is saved in brain, and brain made its duty of analogy and associations. Simple, powerful, definitive.

Thank you Laura.

Lost in the Crowd

Who cares ?

Everybody has his own problems and doesn't want to have another ones. It's human. Sometimes we're afraid of those negative thoughts, like some contamination process.
We forget that, most of time, people don't need help; they just need to speak or share. We are afraid of that. It's human. Yes...Human, but sad.

We don't want to hear about these things; we want to hear something about us. The quest for happyness ? No... The quest for ego. Nothing more. Waiting for somebody to save us ? Strange idea, because everybody needs to be saved. We are all individualists, thinking,... I don't know why,... thinking that we deserve a better world and a better life. Waiting for the perfect being who will be able to make us being greater, smarter... We deserve what we choosed. We are the results of all our mistakes. Then, it's easy to say that, amongst all, we are the more wounded, hurted victim. Then it's easy to reject, or to hate, the other.

I lived that, twice; from the two opposite points of view. I don't believe anymore in any kind of harmony in a couple. I realized that I am just the victim of my own choices. I'm trying to see the whole story from a third point of view : I can see this crowd filled with anonymous egos, each one wanting to find his soulmate. Egos wanting to be saved, not by a romantic and idealistic symbiosis, but rather by some kind of unconscious vampyrism's instinct. Now I see how much I'm useless and guilty in the same time, now I know that I'm truly of no use for anyone. But you know what ?

At least, I know this fact.

Now it's time for me to be back in this crowd but I will look at the sky, not at people, just the sky. I'm tired to have dreams.

Tired to explain and justify.

Tired of this crowd, gathering nearer and nearer to seek some savior and in the same time rejecting each other. We are a living paradox.

Decided to forget dreams, and perhaps to reach the blue sky. And what is this blue sky ? What is this direction where I want to look ? So simple: being useful for people who don't ask for it but need it; my Kids, my family...

Decided to stop trying to reach people who are afraid of me because I'm a mirror of their own soul, decided to stop trying to lowerize the hate that other feel about me.
Decided to forget the pain, the fears and unreachable hopes.

Decided to be in peace with myself, in this blue sky upon me.

I just need to wait for some wings to grow.

I just pray to not fall one more time in the traps of hope.

Decided to stop to be so weak.

Alone

Loneliness never frightened me. Sometimes I'm even looking for it.

I just experimented three things about which I had no protection : having hope, being hated at a such higher level, and being sick.

When all the three are coming together, I think one can speak about Murphy's laws.

I wish I could be without any feelings, without nerves, without brain, or, perhaps, just the piece of brain needed to work on mathematics.

I wish I could be someone harsh, without any empathy.

Is this life cyclic ? No, it's rather like some perverted spiral; going worse and worse at each step. It's an accumulation effect, like if I was a big magnet attracting all negative feelings and thoughts and focusing all this stuff in one point, just there, in heart.

I never thought that having reached my 40's would be a so awful experiment.

Remind me

"And everywhere I go,
There's always something to remind me
Of another place and time
Where love that travelled far had found me.

We stayed outside til two,
Waiting for the light to come back,
But hid in talk I knew,
Until you asked what I was thinking.

.../...

Brave men tell the truth,
A wise man's tools are analogies and puzzles,
A woman holds her tongue,
Knowing silence will speak for her.

So now I'll never know,
As you will only sleep beside me,
And everywhere I go... "


Royksopp, Remind Me

I don't know what day it is

Closed in this house since I don't know how many days.

Falling in the hole of my own failures, mistakes and weaknesses.

Summer is as hot as Hell.

Bitter Days

Bitter Days,
originally uploaded by Deckard@tyrell.corp.

Time to go outside, time to stop thinking, time to forget.

Too much imbedded in this virtual dimension.

The kingdom of appearances, where judgment can be easy, where the fact of truly knowing someone is not really important.

Two Tears

Two Tears,
originally uploaded by Deckard@tyrell.corp.

I'm becoming a close friend of hate; knowing all its traps and effects.

The most dangerous trap is the reference to the people you cherish the most on earth.


It's a stimulus created with careful precision to obtain emotionnal feedback, to wake up your ancestral sense of protection, to wake up your agressivity.


Don't fall in this trap, don't go on this path, or you will fall in hate too, becoming pure wrath.

Don't hate in return, but you don't have to forgive either.

This is a quote I found recently which changed my point of view on the subject :

"If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself. What isn't part of ourselves doesn't disturb us."
Hermann Hesse